Monday, February 28, 2011

Too Sexy For Your Job? Don't Think So!

While checking my email today (and because I still hold onto my old AOL address, as everyone knows it) I saw an article in the business headlines that stated: "Quiz Tells If You're 'Built' to Be Rich" by Gwen Parkes. This has got to be one of the most racist, sexist and downright idiotic things I have ever read!

If you actually bother to read the article, it tells you how your height, hair color, racial heritage and smile, on top of a lot of other things, are defining factors in your salary. Not only that, but it hardly mentions women at all, and when it does, it basically says that only blonde, conservatively dressed women who plaster on makeup and subject themselves to plastic surgery are capable of work in six-figure salary jobs.

The entire quiz was built off of bogus research from such a small sample that there is not one fact presented in the entire article! A few jackasses who gave up their entire family to suck the cock of a high ranking Fortune 500 company position happen to be at or over six feet in height, so this automatically translates to the idea that a person is not only capable, but worthy of such a position purely because of their leg length. Well, I'm a tall bastard coming in at 6'5", so give me my fucking $500,000 job!

It also goes on to say that your face matters in how you are promoted and paid. If you have a younger looking face like I do (probably because I eat a lot of candy and kid's food), you are less likely to be promoted. Not that people with a "mature" face are just as capable of being lazy and mouthing off as those who have, as Parkes has put it, "sprite-looking" ones. Yes, this matters more to human resources than your history with the company and all those incredible ideas you put forward. Who cares if you saved them 2 billion dollars the last fiscal year, you look too young to be promoted! And just what is a mature face for that matter? Does it entail scars? A goatee? A lot of wrinkles? Oh wait, that's a little too mature and shows that you're a tired old curmudgeon and therefore worthless. Remember, moderation!

Then we get to smiling. Work is the last place on Earth you should be smiling. Smiling is reserved for fun, like when you're pillaging a city. Work is work. It's not Stupideedooda for a reason! You're supposed to be miserable and only feign a smile every now and then to show your colleagues that you're really not as suicidal as you seem to be. Even if your job is enjoyable, you can't be expected to be smiling all the time or that often. When working, we put ourselves in a neutral zone to focus on the task at hand. If I saw a co-worker that was smiling as much as this article said you should be, I'd be looking for the fastest way out so I could get a head start and survive the inevitable shootout that is to come.

I love the part where it says you have a better chance to be a success if you have Russian ancestry. There is not one nationality in this world that is better suited for success than any other! I'm a mutt for example. I'm English, Irish, German, Polish, Dutch and a hodgepodge of other European groups in lesser percentages. How does that make me lesser or better suited for a job? This article shows the author's racism very clearly here too; there is no room for black or Hispanic peoples if you follow what the quiz is asking. Maybe in a perfect world that's how it'd be, huh Gwen Parkes? But sadly, we live in a country that has equal opportunities for people of all ethnicities, so you'll just have to keep fighting for that dream while you scrub your favorite white sheet before your "social club's" weekly meeting.

Now, discrimination does exist in the work place despite what the laws say. However, it's not so much for race as it is for age now. Younger people get jobs because "they have more energy". Yeah right. Most people in my age group burn their energy on long nights of binge drinking, wake up at 2 in the afternoon and bitch and moan with every menial task they are assigned. And that's what people want working for them? Age doesn't necessarily mean experience either. I've seen plenty of people in their 50s and 60s who are more ignorant about the world, and have no ability to perform something as simple as stocking shelves without fucking everything up beyond a proper or timely repair.

This article is what's wrong with America. Focus on your looks and not your experience. Who cares about your motivation, or all those years you spent providing incredible services to your business when your tits are two sizes too small. Now, that busty blonde who just dropped out of 5th grade at the age of 26, now that's what we need!

The whole idea of marrying to get promoted seems to be aimed at women more than the rest of this filth. After all, women are simply things that are to be used purely for the sake of childbirth and to give hard working men something to look at while on the job. She's only half that productive by staying single and is not fulfilling her Christian/American duty by procreating; remember, a child out of wedlock is a demon in human form! If a woman is only half as productive in the home, she therefore must be just as lacking on the job and unfit for higher salaries!

Gwen nears the end of her literary diarrhea with a gem:

"If you find your appearance or actions are falling short in certain areas, take the necessary steps to climb the cooperate ladder. Regardless of whether the critical factor be shaving, getting hitched or dying your hair - what do you have to lose?"

Let me think? My dignity is a big one that comes to mind. The point is, I shouldn't have to do anything like that purely for the sake of climbing the cooperate ladder! Gwen is ignorant, shallow and inept for writing such dreck and then promoting it as solid advice.

In response to this, I have decided to post a link to Gwen Parkes' contact page. It's amazing that someone who is so incredibly sexy (ahem, yeah) as her avatar suggests would be reduced to producing such poorly made and ill researched articles. Could it be that you're not that sexy? Or is it that talent, dedication and hard work are required for success, and this article of yours is proof that you are lacking in all of those areas?

I strongly encourage everyone to email this bitch with your thoughts on her article alongside a link to this one so you can tell her Krowness sent you!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Message to the Morons!

I've been getting a bit of flak lately, claiming that I'm a biased liberal douche (i.e. a hippie) simply because I feel that the radical right wing (Tea Party/American Nazi Party/Ku Klux Klan) is holding humanity back and is a vile scourge. Let's set this straight.

I am neither left wing nor right wing. I despise both the Democrats and Republicans in this country. The Democrats can promise all the change they want, but have no backbone to stand up for what they believe in. I think Obama is a great guy, but he's shown himself quite weak as a politician; rather than stand up for what he wants and he believes in, he caves to the pressure of any opponent and will rework his plans until they fit the desires of those he's standing against. This is not how a battle is won.

I think Bush, too, was a weak leader. This is a man who resorted to lying, illegal wire tapping of American citizens and left the Gulf Coast in complete ruin after Hurricane Katrina. He completely failed as a president by failing his own people when they needed him the most (and let's not forget just sitting there listening to a children's book on 9-11 instead of springing right into action, imagine if that were FDR's attitude on December 7th). But he was one of the greatest, most sinister masterminds ever. Anything he wanted Congress to pass, he'd tack the military payment plans onto, so that by denying his agenda, the troops were denied their pay. This is evil genius as its best and is possibly the closest we've ever come to finding a real life Lex Luthor.

I have no problem with how you vote. I have friends who vote on both sides, or go so far as to throw their vote away on Nader. It's idiots I have a problem with. And let's face it, idiocy is politically blind. Clinton was an idiot for hiding a blow job. Most guys gloat over that sort of thing. Obama is an idiot for not standing up for his own ideologies. Bush was just an overall idiot, but like I said, a genius when it came to having his own way regardless of what that meant for the greater population.

The reason I have a thing against the Tea Party is purely because it draws in idiots by the droves. There is not one rational, provable thing these fucktards say and they are moving America back to the Stone Age faster than an apocalyptic event. They have split their own party and now the traditional Republican Party that gave the world His Holyness (Reagan) is seen as a splinter group, and I've seen more bullshit like "RINO Hunters" show up all over Facebook and at local meetings. This is a clear indication of radicalism, and where there's radicals, there's idiots. Just look at Soviet Russia, or Imperial Japan, or fascist Italy, Spain or Germany. It doesn't take much to hypnotize the weaker minded and send an entire nation into ruin.

And for proof, here's what the radical right is doing to repeal and deprive women of every right you can imagine in an attempt to bring America closer to Jesus and other imaginary superheroes, and create the perfect "Leave It To Beaver" Patriarchy that even Islamic militants would be envious of:

Right Wing War on Women

Be sure to read through everything and the sources this article cites. As I've said, I support neither the Democrats nor the Republicans; it's idiots and radicals like this that need to be shut down and are nothing more than a threat to the American Constitution and should be treated like the traitors that they are.

For more on my political views, click here and shut the fuck up.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Did You Get Your Smokey Today?

I had to go to the nearby mall today to get a new dress shirt for a concert I'm playing in this weekend and saw these posters all over the place:

So, my question for everyone is: How do you get YOUR Smokey on?